Nurse Promises Not To Laugh At This Man's Problem. She Failed. This Is Hilarious.

The Nurse asked a patient to remove his clothing and put on a gown to be checked by the doctor.

"In front of you?" He asks, shy.

The Nurse says: "Well no, but I've seen the naked human body before."

The Patient said, "Not one like mine. You'd die laughing at my naked body."

"Of course I won't laugh," said the Nurse to the patient. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."

"Okay then," said the Patient, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing a huge male body with the smallest adult male organ the Nurse had ever seen in her life.

In length and width it was almost identical to a AAA battery.

Unable to control herself, the Nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came out.

And then she started laughing at the fact that she was laughing. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the Patient's private part, she composed herself as well as she could.

"I am so sorry," the Nurse said, "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise that it won't happen again. Now tell me, what seems to be the problem?"

"It's swollen," the Patient replied.

She ran out of the room.

Sometimes we think we know exactly what to expect. Sometimes we're very wrong.

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20 Extremely Well-Mannered Insults To Use On Your Worst Enemy. Number 15 Is Genius.

1. May the chocolate chips in your cookies always turn out to be raisins.

2. May every sock you wear be slightly rotated, just enough for it to be uncomfortable.

3. May your mother come to talk to you, and then leave your door slightly ajar, so that you have to get up and close it.

4. May your article load that extra little bit as you're about to click a link so you click an ad instead.

5. May both sides of your pillow be warm.

6. May you forever feel your cellphone vibrating in the pocket it's not even in.

7. May you always get up from your computer with your headphones still attached.

8. May your life be as pleasant as you are.

9. May your chair produce a sound similar to a fart, but only once, such that you cannot reproduce it to prove that it was just the chair.

10. May your five year old neighbor have their violin lessons during all of your hangovers.

True Value Of Life

A man went to God and asked, "What's the value of life?"

God gave him one stone and said, "Find out the value of this stone, but don't sell it."

The man took the stone to an Orange Seller and asked him what it's cost would be.
The Orange Seller saw the shiny stone and said, "You can take 12 oranges and give me the stone."
The man apologized and said that the God has asked him not to sell it.

He went ahead and found a vegetable seller. "What could be the value of this stone?" he asked the vegetable seller. The seller saw the shiny stone and said, "Take one sack of potatoes and give me the stone."
The man again apologized and said he can't sell it.

Further ahead, he went into a jewellery shop and asked the value of the stone.
The jeweler saw the stone under a lens and said, "I'll give you 50 Lakhs for this stone." When the man shook his head, the jeweler said, "Alright, alright, take 2 crores, but give me the stone."
The man explained that he can't sell the stone. Further ahead, the man saw a precious stone's shop and asked the seller the value of this stone.