3 Signs You're In Love, But It's Not True Love

Love can be a very fickle emotion, always doing exactly what it wants to do. Sometimes, when it comes to love, we learn from the most tragic of heartbreaks how to cope with that despair within ourselves.

However, once you realize that love is something that cannot be contained, you will realize that it is one of the most beautiful things that the world has to offer. Many people forget that love is usually the answer to a majority of their problems.

However, here's how you can recognize if you are actually in love with the person you are with. If these things describe your relationship, then it might not be love at all.

You are Only With this Person from Fear of Being Alone

If you are only with this person simply because you want to fill the desire of not having to be alone, then this is not true love. You are with this person because you can't handle being alone with yourself for more than two seconds, so you need someone else to mirror or vicariously live through the things that you've always wanted to. You may have to look deep within yourself in order to figure out why you are so codependent. You also need to realize that being an independent person from your lover is a very necessary piece of any relationship.

Long for the Same Things

Do you both long for the same things in life? Though having shared hopes and dreams is good for a relationship, it doesn't mean that the relationship will actually work long enough for you both to achieve those goals together. It's important to think of what you both look like together in the present moment instead of what might happen in the future. You will be much more grounded if you live your life day to day with them, fulfilling any kind of happiness that you both see in each other. If you both do end up lasting longer than expected, then good for you! However, don't take it personal if it ends up not working out.

Love the Way They Make You Feel

Just because this person can make you feel good doesn't exactly warrant a good reason for you to fall in love with them. Yes, we all love those touchy-feely emotions we get when we are first meeting someone, but realize that those feelings may be yours and yours alone. It's important to enjoy yourself while you have those emotions, but know that they are not worth falling in love with someone over. Take your love in stride, just remember that they are happy to be with you; put your friendship in front of everything else.

Hopefully this has given you some insight into the world of love and what it means to be in love with someone. There are some little things here and there where it can prove to be difficult to manage a relationship, but just as long as you keep moving forward, then you will do just fine.

Use These 3 Simple Steps to Solve ANY Argument

Having arguments with your partner is not the best thing in the world. I'm pretty sure that we would all love an easier way we can approach them, come to a resolution, and go back to loving each other again without feeling like we just got done kicking and screaming.

Essentially, it all boils down to taking a deep breath, carefully thinking about what you want to say, and then confronting your partner with the hope that you'll both come to an understanding with one another. Love is a complex emotion, so it's okay that you two have fights. However, it's important that you both create a solution together.

Come to Terms with These Aspects of Conflict:

For you two to truly understand each other, you are both going to need to follow these tips for for conflict resolution. It's hard, in a heated fight, to avoid the urge to act in negative ways. Try to:

• Listen to each other
• Give each other turns to speak their mind
• Focus on today instead of the past
• Think of your partner's needs over your own needs
• Never threaten with a divorce
• Never act with violence or threatening them with violence
• Control the volume of your voices, no yelling
• Never blame each other
• Never call each other names, belittle, or degrade

Before you begin any kind of confrontation, it's important you stay relaxed and really focused on the key issues that you would like to address. Stay as civil as you possibly can be.

Understand Your Emotions and Why You Feel This Way

If you feel as though you are sad, depressed in anyway, you need to explore these feelings and why you are feeling them. If you can truly realize what the problem is with your relationship that is making you so miserable, then tell them. Tell them everything about how you feel, how you feel about them, what is making you so sad, and let them know that you want to fix it.

If you are confronting them out of fear, or are anxious about them no longer wanting to be with you, then you must come to an understanding within yourself. Love does exactly what it wants to do. If it means taking a different path than your own, then you will have to focus on what is happening today rather than what might happen in the future. You cannot control everything that happens in a relationship. Sometimes, it's better that you no longer be together in the long run. Do not despair.

If the reason you are confronting them is out of anger or frustration (being the most common of emotions), then you first must learn to calm yourself down. Keep yourself steady and stable as you confront them about your concerns, wants, and needs. Nothing can be solved with violence; use logic and reason.

It's All About Perspective

There is always more than one point of view. Your point of view may not always be the right one. It is wise to consider everything that your partner has told you, that you truly listen to their words so you know what they expect. Give them space to consider the same. If they care, they will think about the words you have given them.

Take your time to work these things out. Chances are, you both are just having one really big misunderstanding that's easily fixable with just a little bit of communication.