Father

A beautiful young woman, on an international flight, asked the priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?”

“Of course you may. What can I do for you?”

“Well, I bought this expensive electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I’m afraid that they’ll confiscate it from me. Is there anyway that you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?”

“I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.”

“With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.”

When they got to Customs, the young lady let the priest go ahead of her. The Customs Officer asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?”

“From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.”

The Officer thought this answer strange, so he asked, “And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?”

“I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.”

Roaring with laughter, the Officer said, “God bless you, Father, go ahead.” 

very funny

Phone rings... 

GIRL:"Hello..

Boy:"My luv how r u doing..??

GIRL:"Am fine..

Boy:"Will you be free during the weekend, and can u come to my house.. ??

GIRL:"Am sorry I cant make it because Iwill be attending my aunty's wedding and the next day
i will be busy, i am so occupied..

Boy:"Ooh ok,was just planning to take you out for shopping, surprise you with an iPhone5, then buy you the dress you have been asking for...

GIRL:"I will be coming and I may even spend the whole weekend there if you want my love..

Boy:"What about the wedding.. ??

GIRL:"Which wedding,I was Joking...

Boy:"Me too..